Ah this book - ‘If I could tell you just one thing’ by Richard Reed. I flip to a random page and land on Stephen fry’s advice ...
'It is never right to look at someone successful and think “That person’s got money, that persons got looks, that person’s good at cricket…so it’s easy for them.” Chances are, 90 percent of the time you’re wrong. But even if it is somehow true, thinking that is a very self-destructive thing. It leads only to resentment, which is corrosive and destroys everything but itself.' He goes on to say the key is to ‘work your bloody bollocks off’.
I sit and smile to myself, because I’ve been sat here for a while trying to think of something to write for this blog. So many ideas running through my mind but not one of them fit with me today. ‘No I don’t want to write that’ ‘people won’t want to read that’ and so on.
Through all of my time working in care, the thing I love the most is hearing people’s life stories, where they worked, what they’ve experienced, their opinions, upbringing, everything, because it’s so unique to everybody. We can all experience the same thing, but react in totally different ways, and the experience has a completely different impact on all of us. We would also probably tell the story of the experience differently too.
How amazing would it be if we could all have our own autobiography, our life story for people to read and learn from, to laugh and to cry? We all have our stories. A lot of the large historic events happened in our grandparents life times, with them sits years of wisdom, history, true life events that we would sit and watch play out through a TV screen. Not only do we enjoy watching films of true events, but also the romantic comedies getting lost in the story lines, feeling emotionally invested for the characters achievements and losses. But how often do we sit and listen to each other’s real life events? Or even think about our own? How far we have come, through things we thought would break us, times we felt the happiest in the world. We have story plots sitting right there, within us, why keep them to ourselves? So people don’t judge us? So people don’t think of us differently? So we don’t feel vulnerable? But how about the positives – people could learn from us, our history is shared and lives on with others, people will feel less alone if they go through the same situation, feeling empowered by you speaking your truth.
Some people probably think ‘I don’t have any stories to tell’ But I say to you – you do, you’re here, you have a story. Whether it’s the time you zip lined, got stuck and lost your shoe, the time you laughed so hard your drink nearly came out your nose, the time you lost someone close to you, the time you had on holiday with family or friends, the time it snowed so bad you were stranded, when you got back so late from a night out, how your parents chased you around in circles to tell you off when you were a child, when you stood up for yourself, when you quit your awful job. We all have a story, and they’re each as valuable as the other.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, listen to each other’s stories, ask each other question’s you’ve never asked before and find out something new. Learn from each other, laugh with each other.
I’ve put together some questions to start the conversation. Hope you enjoy going through them, and have fun.
What was your favourite age growing up?
What was your favourite holiday?
Where is your favourite place to visit?
What is your favourite quote?
What’s the best joke you’ve heard?
Have you ever been to a concert? What was your favourite concert?
What’s your earliest memory?
Have you been through a life changing situation?
What things are on your bucket list?
What’s the worst job you’ve ever had?
How do you pick yourself up after making a mistake?
What’s the best advice you’ve received?
What’s your favourite story about your grandparents?
Do you have any family traditions?
What do you think makes someone a good person?
What hobbies did/do you have?
What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done? And why?
If you could do anything for a job, what would it be?
What’s your most prized possession? And why?
What would be the title of your autobiography?
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